no one special

hi there,

it’s been a while since i decided to write something,

i was all caught up, trying to participate, but i still haven’t figured it out yet

fortunately i missed the writing part of me, so i decided to drop something

do you know that we start dying at the moment we are born??

damm, that’s a messed up way to start this,

it all got me thinking of something,

you can never see a moving car carrying all someone’s

belongings following a hearse,

you can never take this material items with you,

the egyptians tried it but you know how that went

life is happening for us not to us

don’t do everyday everyday

either you run the day or the day runs you

be spontaneously violent

be like water

go deep not wide

in the pursuit of the things we want,

don’t loose yourself, hold on to your inner child

be kind for everyone is fighting a hard battle

and if you really wanna see what people are,

all you have to do is look

reality bites

i have been racking my brain all day

to find a better way to send of 2020,

how was i going to end this year,

what was i going to say (write)??

what i came up with was,

what i am thankful for this year?

i found out that am thankful for alot of things

but mostly my mum and being alive

what a year we have gone through together,

remember to give yourself some love

it may be easy to wollow in the tragedy that 2020 was,

and it’s natural to focus on those unspeakable

moments that brought us to our knees,

but we must remind ourselves that we got up,

took the story a little bit further and there was love

normal, that’s the new watchword

when there’s a will there’s is a way kind of beautiful

reflect on love, life and the people in it

what are you thankful for this year??

i hope you know how loved you are

and remember always be kind

many leaves one tree

(we maybe individuals but we are connected as one)

good thoughts, good words, good deeds

there’s is no present like time

i thought 2020 will be the year i got everything i ever

wanted, now i know 2020 is the year i appreciate

everything i have

if this year has taught me something is that my

temperature is 36.3

its  a marathon and all we gotta do is keep going on

celebrate every moment, every fucking breathe

really every breathe

it’s not always about the end,

it’s about the journey and 2020

was definitely a long one

always be grateful

we survived

peace and goodwill towards others,

that’s what the holidays is all about

merry christmas

and

happy new year

oh dae-su

life is the theatre of the unpredictable you know

somewhere someone is,

dying, getting robbed, winning the lottery,

abused, beaten, treated horribly

people really go through a lot

and it happens every day

it’s just a cycle of hurt people hurt people

i am a professional overthinker

existing is exhausting

i don’t sleep i dream

to live is to fight

dear brain, leave my head alone

nights are like human beings

they’re too brief

everyone you meet always asks you,

if you have a career,

married,

or own a house,

as if life was some kind of grocery list

but no one ever asks you if you are happy

at the end of the day people are just dissapointing,

so typical, so selfish

people ruin everything

we all need mirrors to remind ourselves who we are

we all try every single thing to escape our lives,

we fake it,

we lie,

we cheat,

but unfortunately it catches up to us,

whether it be a grain of sand or a rock in water they

both sink alike

i am inevitable says life

ps

i hope there you are happy

we will see beautiful days

breathe

you are sexual,

you’re soulful,

you’re emotional,

you’re spiritual,

you’re magic,

you’re both of the light and the dark,

breathe

you only live once,

false, you live everyday

you die once

be the reason

someone believes in good people

words are so small,

deeds are giants

laugh and the world laughs with you,

weep and you weep alone

well , if one’s different,

one’s bound to be lonely

Oh Dae-Su

stay weird

the boy

i lost my body

what is it to be human?

what is it to be alive?

what is more beautiful than death?

i don’t know

ive been thinking too much help me

i feel fear, anxiety, loneliness and darkness

busy with unhealthy thoughts

i always feel like am always shouting

i am here but nobody seems to hear me,

nobody responds

is anybody out there?

my entire, existence

pointless and unnecessary

we are all alone

i promise you,

there is something worse out there than being sad

and that’s being alone and being sad

life always finds a way

to tell you that you are fucked up

you can’t always win cest la vie

confessions of a dangerous mind

being alone is being free

its very comforting to be cut off

from the world like that

to see nothing, to hear nothing

we are children of the bad revolution

we tripped on the urge to feel alive

i hope someday we will find our place in the world

sometimes there is no leason

that’s a lesson in itself

raise your words, not your voice,

it is rain that makes the flowers grow not thunder

dont let the wisdom of age be wasted on you

be curious not judgemental

onward forward

i hope there are days

that you fall in love with being alive

maybe there is a method to his(the world) madness

hopefully one day we will find out

but for now im going to choose my ending

the perks of being a writer

stay weird

the boy

all falls down

everything put together falls apart

nothing lasts forever

the one thing we are guaranteed

when we are born is that we will die

but in my culture death is not the end,

it’s more of a stepping off point

everything is strange, life, people

nobody cares unless you are rich, beautiful or dead

we are all broken, thats how the light gets in

we are a sad generation with happy pictures

i was born in the wrong generation

i am passionate, broken, lost, depressed and cool

don’t look for me in the crowd

come find me in solitude,

i never fit in i was never supposed to

i used to be good at socializing

i guess i stopped seeing the point,

sometimes it’s just easier

to slip into your own dark abyss and forget the world exists

being young is so painful,

it’s too much to feel

a lonely saturday night feels like an eternity of solitude

i guess that’s the unbareble darkness of being young

sometimes we laugh,

sometimes we cry i guess you know now

cheer up,

life only gets worse from here

adult hood is like this mess of sadness and phobias

the only thing that is guaranteed is pain

disssapointments are an absolute certainity,

everyone let’s somebody down at a certain point

adulting is suffering and suffering is caused by desire

the cessation of desire means the cessation of suffering

if this is reality am not interested

my only relief in this life is sleep

when am sleeping am not sad, angry or lonely

i’m nothing

life is just a journey and am still writing mine

i can’t let calculus be the reason i will cry myself to sleep

stop thinking of the right answer

just be

life only exists now

be present

to travel is better than to arrive

to those people who appreciate my existence

thank you

wakanda forever

i’m thinking of ending things

i’ve always wanted my life to be like a movie

you know,

get the girl and save the world

but man greatest flaw,

the illusion of control

i’m writing this in my bed

staring at the ceiling

in my head talking to these demons

how are you?

(asks my inner consciousness)

(my answer)

miserable as usual perfectly wretched

i am tragically flawed,

i am happy hurting and healing

at the same damn time don’t ask how,

(my consciousness reply)

It’s a lonely road stay alive

what the fuck is family?

i can’t take that serious

thank God everybody sucks,

so that i can write this

blood is thicker than water

but you can always drown in either

i have this weird self esteem issue

where i hate myself

but i still think am better than everyone else

yes life will kill you

it’s all about keeping it together

and falling apart at the same damn time

we are so desperate of feeling anything

so we end up

falling in love and fucking our way to the end of days

i guess what everyone wants,

is to be seen, to be accepted

loving you (loving myself) has been the most

profound intense, painful experience of my life,

in fact it’s been too hard to bare

the hardest prison to escape is my mind

noble in thought weak in action

it’s getting dark, dark to see

maybe when you are dead

is when people start listening

stay weird

the boy

never rarely sometimes always

i am a walking pile of contradictions

i truly tried to be normal,

but unfortunately

i am not wired that way

i’m always anxious,

thinking am not living my life to the fullest

is this really the boldest stroke i can make?




life is suffering

we are born just to die

hell is other people

the most personal is the most creative

all great art comes from pain

you will survive until you don’t



life is irrational and meaningless

boredom is fun

reality is the disease

fantasy is the pill

everything beautiful

is ruined eventually,

maybe that’s the thing



life is a kaleidoscope of emotions,

its ok to feel happy, sad, hopeful

i am unsure of the future,

but am not concerned

existence is discovery




life is about romance, tragedy and sex

the only true language in the world is a kiss

we love, to practice only letting each other go

so many conditions on unconditional love

fuck nudes, send me a reason to live



let everything happen to you

beauty and terror

just keep going

no feeling is final



i suppose in the end the whole of life

becomes an act of letting go,

but what always hurts the most

is not taking a moment to say goodbye

stay weird

the boy

the wasted youth

what is the most important question human beings

must answer?

mine would be

how will I get out of this labyrinth of suffering?

the answer would be

i dont know, but i’ll survive somehow i always do



true courage is about being honest with yourself,

especially when it’s difficult

in a perfect world we make perfect choices,

in the real world we make real choices



the world is so cruel, too much anger, too much hate

it’s a world of beautiful ordered chaos



shits keep happening and all that you can do is react

i believe we are all alone

nothing matters, why bother

happiness just makes us unhappy



it’s easy to hate, its easy to fear

but it’s goddamn hard to love

we shouldn’t be this kind of tired at our age


we are all desperate for something better,

something true



people expect our generation to move mountains,

but truth is we are more lost than ever

the fact that we expect love to hurt is pretty fucked up



everybody hurts

we could only be truly happy

if we could freeze time forever



it’s always sunny above the clouds,

however awful it is on earth

if you are going through hell keep going

pain is weakness leaving the body



we are who we are

because of consequences

so

be better

do better

be kind



don’t grow up too fast too soon,

save some time for dreaming



in the end only three things matter

how much you loved

how gently you lived

how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you


we all are on the pursuit of happiness

stay weird

the boy

nowhere boy

hello old friend ,

long time,

i’ve missed you,

where did you go?

i hate when i can’t hold my loneliness

why can’t i just be happy?

maybe, i like being miserable

what is wrong with me?

why do i feel this empty void inside me?

the truth is, i am the one to blame

i’m the problem,

this is my fault,

i did this,

we really are the source of our own hell

but how do i take off a mask,

when it stops being a mask,

when it is as much a part of me as i am?

what i wouldn’t give to be normal,

to live in that bubble

the reality of the naive,

lol who am i kidding,

i just realized i like doors,

they make the outside stop

you know what disssapoints me about society

the world itself’s just one big hoax

spamming with our running commentary

of bullshit masquerading as insight,

and our social media faking as intimacy

the obvious unseen

seeing and not seeing

control can sometimes be an illusion

but sometimes you need illusion to gain control

fantasy is an easy way to give meaning to the world

to cloak our harsh reality with escapist comfort

isn’t that why we surround ourselves

with so many screens?

where’s my mind

stay weird

the boy

remains of the day

life is the theatre of the unpredictable

though three words i can sum up about life

it goes on

during this period

we really need to come together

make sense of the senseless

and we will survive

every day is all we have

live with peace and love

continue creating beauty

for those who are in the forefront

running to the rescue with love

you are really appreciated

for risking your precious lives to save ours

sometimes life gets pretty ugly before it gets beautiful

so stay home, wash your hands, stay safe

we will definitely get through this

stay weird

the boy